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minermike
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 Posted -
1/25/2010
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3:11:13 PM
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The economy is so bad that I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.
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> It's so bad, I ordered a burger at McDonald's and the kid behind the counter asked, "Can you afford fries with that?"
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> The economy is so bad that CEO's are now playing miniature golf.
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> The economy is so bad if the bank returns your check marked "Insufficient Funds," you call them and ask if they meant you or them.
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> The economy is so bad Hot Wheels and Matchbox stocks are trading higher than GM.
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> The economy is so bad McDonald's is selling the 1/4 ouncer.
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> The economy is so bad parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children's names.
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> The economy is so bad a truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico
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> The economy is so bad Dick Cheney took his stockbroker hunting.
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> The economy is so bad Motel Six won't leave the light on anymore.
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> The economy is so bad the Mafia is laying off judges.
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> The economy is so bad Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen..
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> And, finally...
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> I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, Healthcare, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I called the Suicide Lifeline. I got a call center in Pakistan, and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck.
Enjoy, Miner Mike
http://minermike.multiply.com/
www.alabamagoldcamp.com
The "Gold Thing" There is No Cure for it ,Just
ongoing treatment !!!! ©
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admin
Admin
44 Posts
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Posted - 1/28/2010 : 9:14:26 AM
My Resume
1. My first job was working in an Orange Juice factory, but I got canned. I couldn't concentrate.
2. Then I worked in the woods as a Lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.
3. After that, I tried to be a Tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it - mainly because it was a sew-sew job.
4. Next, I tried working in a Muffler Factory, but that was too exhausting.
5. Then, I tried to be a Chef - figured it would add a little spice to my life, but I just didn't have the thyme.
6. Next, I attempted to be a Deli Worker, but any way I sliced it I couldn't cut the mustard.
7. My best job was a Musician, but eventually I found I wasn't noteworthy.
8. I studied a long time to become a Doctor, but I didn't have any patience.
9. Next, was a job in a Shoe Factory. I tried but I just didn't fit in.
10. I became a Professional Fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my net income.
11. I managed to get a good job working for a Pool Maintenance Company, but the work was just too draining.
12. So then I got a job in a Workout Center but they said I wasn't fit for the job.
13. After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a Historian - until I realized there was no future in it.
14. My last job was working in Starbucks, but I had to quit because it was always the same old grind.
15. SO, I TRIED RETIREMENT AND FOUND THAT I'M PERFECT FOR THE JOB!
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digger chuck
GreenHorn
4 Posts
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Posted - 2/6/2010 : 7:59:22 PM
Thanks for the laugh1
Leave no stone un-turned. Digger Chuck |
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The Economy is so bad when,
